R³

If there’s one thing that really blows my fuse instantly, it would be getting hung up by someone just like that. It is just PURE rudeness and disrespect. There was no “byes” or whatsoever, just the click of the phone.

I just had done to me.

It was an accident of course; clarified and dismissed casually. However, this incident really made my head  started to whirl with many thoughts.

How many times did we just hung up on God just like that?

All that overnight prayers that never had an “Amen”; all the silent prayers that were interrupted by friends that were eager to talk to us.

I’m sorry God.

What many men seek is often under their nose. But for some the unknown is too hard to resist.
-Eragon, Uncle Garrow

Sometimes, it always seems that…
the past is regrettable,
the present unappreciated,
and the future enticing.

I need to learn to have earthly satisfaction and holy discontentment.

As our groups grow bigger,
we unknowingly have to deal with more problems.
Sometimes the problem overwhelms us,
such as to the extend that we lose sight of the situation in its entirety:
We have so many problems because we have so many people.
That in itself is a reason to continue fighting; the spirit of defiance

We don’t have a great pile of dirt,
we just have a trove of diamonds that needs some polishing.

Let me leave you with this immortal line.

A vehicle filled with wounded American soldiers lurches to a stop in the middle of a street where Somali bullets are flying in everything direction.

McKnight: You, get up there and drive!
Othic: But I’m shot Colonel!
McKnight: Everybody’s shot! Let’s go!
-Black Hawk Down

I have (perhaps) come to realize how to benchmark faith tangibly.

Our faith is not only measured in our beliefs, but in our disappointments. Disappointment fundamentally stems from failed expectations. We get disappointed because we place our faith in something we trust. We can say that we truly believe in somebody, but that can be merely lip service. True faith is only reveal in the presence of disappointment. This is why our enemies never disappoint us; we expect only that much (or that little).

Hence, only those who are disappointed with God can profess to have truly placed their faith in Him. Not that God ever fails, just that our expectations are flawed to begin with. How can we say that we believe in God’s healing powers yet not be disappointed when the ill are not healed? Either we are really mature, or we did not expect the healing to occur in the first place. Come to think of it, it is little wonder why children cry easily; their child-like faith made them easily disappointed by the numbed adults around them.

Faith asks for the gambles of undiluted joy or intense sorrow. She would have none of that in-between nonsense.

“The sharpness of a blade is not defined by what it cannot cut, but what it can cut.”

[Hebrews 4:12 - Contemporary English Version]
What God has said isn’t only alive and active! It is sharper than any double-edged sword. His word can cut through our spirits and souls and through our joints and marrow, until it discovers the desires and thoughts of our hearts.

[Acts 2:37 - NIV]
When the people heard this, they were cut to the heart and said to Peter and the other apostles, “Brothers, what shall we do?”

Some people lament why God did not bring His Kingdom onto Earth through physical force instead of His word. A sword, no matter how sharp, cannot cut the soul and the spirit. You can chop off someone’s leg to stop him from running, but you cannot crush his determination. Vice-versally, once you killed his spirit, his legs are but just decorations.

A simple word from God can cut our hearts and soul. No wonder He uses words instead of physical force; physical forces pales in comparison to words. Words are the weapons of mass destruction. Unknowingly, we might have been committing countless murders everyday.

[Proverbs 15:4 - NIV]
The tongue that brings healing is a tree of life, but a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit.

1.  I had a dream this morning
2.  I enjoyed the dream.
3.  However, that does not make it a good dream.

In the dream, I was so happy that even asked my friend who was inside, “Is this a dream?” Since only alert and fully awake people can pinch themselves and/or ask such questions, I took it to be reality.

The consequence? Extreme disappointment.

In fact, I wasn’t even sure which realm I had awakened into.

Sometimes, I’m not even sure which is the nightmare:

A bad dream that you can’t seem to wake up from,
or a good dream you can’t seem to stay asleep in. 

Looks like even my sleepy friend won’t help me with my escapes to the other reality anymore.

Some of my randomness before entering the stage of rapid eye movements.

We were told to believe in people.
Belief in people instills expectations.
Expectations are the setup for disappointment.

Go figure the last equation.